Is there any way to fall back in love with your husband if you fell for someone else?

I have been married for almost 2 years. I was concered about the person I was marrying, wondering if he was really the ';right'; one for me, or was I just content to settle because everything was so comfortable. About 6 months into my marriage I met someone else that completely turned my world upside down. He seemed as though he was everything that I had ever wanted. I could not keep myself from thinking about and wanting to be with him. I had such guilt about what I was doing to my husband and the fact that I believe that divorce is wrong that I shut him out. There were so many mitigating factors I could not see how it could ever really work. I stayed with my husband and now a year later I am still miserable and think about the other guy all the time. He consumes my thoughts all the time and I cannot even begin to want to be sexual with my husband.. i am completely turned off even by the thought. I know this is a lot of rambling... any thoughts are much appreciated!Is there any way to fall back in love with your husband if you fell for someone else?
Marrying someone because its comfortable is a mistake lots of people make. Sometimes it's because we marry when we're too young and don't really who we are yet. Sometimes we marry because we think it's our ';last chance';. Sometimes we simply make a bad decision. You have an opportunity to turn this bad situation into something pretty positive.





You've got to take the emphasis away from yourself for a minute and think of your husband.





If you decide to stay you need to stay because you know you can truly be the wife your husband deserves. This will be very hard work. You've got a lot of fences to mend. If you're determined to make this situation work that you'll have to force yourself to eliminate the fantasy of the other man from your life. For awhile you'll probably need to ';fake it 'til you make it'; and just be a great wife in EVERY way even when you don't feel like it. If you're truly concentrating on your marriage, you'll find this gets easier as you go along. Seeing someone for counseling alone or with your husband might help speed things along.





OR


You'll explain to your husband that you entered into this union under false pretenses and end the marriage. It's not fair for you to keep him in limbo, locked into a marriage with someone who isn't sure she wants to be his wife. If you truly don't see a future with him, it would be very kind of you to let him go so he has the opportunity to find someone who can really love him.Is there any way to fall back in love with your husband if you fell for someone else?
You are such a damn woman -- you want the drama of another relationship, not another man. You got married to a decent man but you realized that suddenly the dating was over and now all you want to do have some sort of emotional 'high' because you're bored. If you don't have children then please, please give your husband a break and divorce him.


You need therapy.....
You are a person that really doesn't know what she wants and will hurt all around you,6 months into a marriage and looking for another guy is very low as in cheating and what gos around comes around,so you need to get your act together and work on your marriage,sex with your husband and now it makes you turn off that is bull you are thinking of some one else and that's turning you off to your husband.Any guy will do wrong by you and then where are going to be,lonely,very lonely.
Grass always seems greener on the other side.





Get councling. Talk with your husband.





if that isn't an option well then maybe it's time both went their separate ways.





Another idea would be to do what you did when you were dating. Go back to those days, look at the things that you feel in love with him for in the first place.
Wow, your a heartless beast. I feel sorry for your husband!
Notice the good things about your husband.. Do you see this guy at all?.. I know i had a crush and wouldn't stop thinking about him. And I was in a relationship and i still am but i wanted to break up with him and go to the guy.. but since its summer and we don't have school and i don't see him but once a week i really haven't thought of him that much.. Yes i still obsess about him sometimes but that's it.
YES, IT IS POSSIBLE. JUST SPEND MORE TIME WITH HIM AND DO THINGS THAT YOU WOULD NOT NORMALLY DO WITH HIM. YOU CAN RESTORE YOUR MARRIAGE. GOOD LUCK!
Figure out what it is that you think this other guy will do for you. What are you lacking in your life that you think only this guy can fulfill. Know that it's not so much about the other guy as it is about your idea of the other guy.





Chances are...in the long run, you will end up thinking the same things about him.





You are chasing a fantasy. It will help you to figure out why or you will continue chasing fantasies all your life.





Your life with your husband will not always be about constant attraction and happiness. Please know that if you continue to look to other people to provide constant bliss, you will be looking forever.





Look inward and seek the truth of the matter.
You should both go to couseling and see if you can resolve our problems together or not.
email me please scandleight@yahoo.com
Wow. This is a really tough situation. I know you believe divorce is wrong but it kind of seems as if it is the only thing that can fix the situation. It is really horrible for you to be miserable in life and it is unfair for you to stay with your husband when he obviously is not the one you want. I know morals are a hard thing to ';give up'; but what once may apply to the way you think may not neccesarily apply anymore. People change everyday and along with changing themselves there thoughts and morals change too. I know this is probably not the answer you were looking for but to me it seems like the solution. Best of luck
you did not say , if there are any children involved?


or how old you are?


but what is heard allot from you is , I!


IT IS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU.


you state very clearly from the beginning that you were not sure if the decision you were making was for the right reason.


well, i guess he was the right one.


because who would put up with nearly two years


of your selfish treatment towards him.


so, if you do not have any children with him. stop taking up his time.


i am sure there will be another women out there for him, that will know how to make the right decisions and choices together with him.


it will probably hurt him. but he deserves better, plus he is not going to die! he will probably in the long run fill comfort, from not having to live with your mistreatment.


it is seldom that one can live happy from the hurt of someone-else.


if you have children with your husband, then stop thinking of the other guy and focus on your child. it will just be 18 years, then do whatever your mixed-up self wants to do.


many might think maybe even you, that it is not fair to have to go through this but, it is not fair for the other person involved either. there is enough selfishness lived and thought to many, now days that is one of the reasons why there was confusion from the begining. it needs to stop somewhere.


step up to the plate and make the right decision for the both of you. but do not continue to hurt him.


ps. keep busy, that should take care of some of that time that you are wasting daydreaming.
Just like a woman. Heartless, cold.





Just put a bullet in him and put him out of his misery.





Now, get help, talk to him/husband. Is this just a physical, lust thing or is there more to why you don't want your husband now.





Does the other guy have feelings for you? You could be chasing something that will do to you what you are doing to your ex-to be.
OH MY, ANOTHER PERSON MARRYING FOR CONVIENCE! THAT IS WHAT YOU DID. YOU WERE USE TO HIM AND SETTLED! YOU NEVER SHOULD HAVE MARRIED HIM WHEN YOU HAD 'CONCERNS' ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS.





THEN, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN FREE TO FIND ANOTHER AND BE HAPPY.





THE GOAL IN THIS ONE LIFE OF OURS IS TO BE AS HAPPY AS POSSIBLE...MAKING WISE DECISIONS IS THE WAY TO DO THAT.





YOU WILL NEVER FORGET THIS MAN BECAUSE OF THE 'WHAT IF' FACTOR. DOES HE WANT YOU OR KNOW HOW YOU FEEL?





Well, the only thing you should do is to get a divorce, because although you appreciate your hubby, YOU DO NOT LOVE HIM and you are doing him no favor by staying.





After the divorce, you will be free to seek happiness with another and so will he. AH, A LEVEL PLAYING BOARD! LOVE IT!





OR, STAY WHERE YOU ARE AND JUST BE MISERABLE!


AND DON'T COMPLAIN.
that sounds exactly like me.ive ben married for 10 years.6 months ago i met a guy that i actually fell in love with.i havent been happy with my husband for years.i never thought i would find someone i could laugh,joke,be myself,and most of all fall in love with.i think about him 24/7.i got caught so i told my husband everything.he wants to work it out and im tryin we have 3 kids 2gether.but my heart isnt in it no more.im so confused but im afraid im gonna lose the other guy.he might get tired of waiting.we r stil talkin on the phone but i havent seen him in like 3 weeks.and its killin me.so i know how u feel.feel free to email me.
Love is more than a feeling. If you truly want to fall back in love with your husband start loving him. It is hard to control your feelings but we can control our actions.





SO... start acting like you are falling back in love and your feelings will follow. Is it hard to be loving to someone you don't necessarily feel in love with? YES. But every married couple who has been together any serious length of time would say there have been times that they had a hard time liking each other. The ones who stay together for a lifetime continue to love even when they don't feel like it.
Get some serious help for your marriage.You can't just walk away from it 2 years down the track.I f you leave your husband for this other man you may find after a while that it was not the right choice for you and you go seeking your husband again.You may just find that he has moved on.Where is that going to leave you?
You shouldn't have gotten married if you weren't sure in the first place. Life is too short to be unhappy and you aren't being fair to your husband. Tell him the truth, that you were wrong.
yup!