Falling in love with brother in law after husbands death. what are your views?

This question is not for me, but for a friend/coworker of mine. Her husband Jeff, his brother Eric and Erics 8 year old son Connor, were in a horrible car crash nearly a year ago. Her husband Jeff and his nephew Connor died. Eric (who is unmarried by the way) was severely injured and spent about 2 months in the hospital and went through months of physical therapy. Both my friend, Tracy, and Eric have also gotten counceling. Needless to say, both Tracy and Eric were devistated. Tracy lost a husband and Eric lost a brother and son.Suddenly, Tracy and Eric were thrown together in their dispair and grief. Each leaning on the other. Each trying to be there for the other one. Well, in the months that followed the accident, Eric and Tracy got very close and are now in love. Have been an actual couple for about two months now. The problem is, that many family members on both sides and some friends of the dead husband, Jeff, are not happy with this and think that it is disrespectful to Jeff. Jeff and Tracy were happily married before he passed and like I said, Eric is unmarried. To me, I understand how two people can come together in grief and fall in love. I also think that Tracys husband would have wanted her to be happy again, and be with a good man. It will be a year in October since the accident. What are your views on this? How would you feel if you were a friend or family member of Jeff?Falling in love with brother in law after husbands death. what are your views?
On the surface it seems disrespectful, but honestly, brothers often share many physical and mental traits which would make Eric a great replacement compatibility wise. I have several friends who have hooked up with two brothers and they (the girls, and the brothers) never seemed to have a problem with it. Ultimately, if love just happened between them- they didn't choose it ! I would respect their love and happiness and wish them the best. I'm sure no one would rather see them alone, miserable, and grieving for the remainder of their lives ....Falling in love with brother in law after husbands death. what are your views?
I totally agree with you, her husband would want her to be happy and who better then his brother, it is a but soon, which the family probably frowns on, but as long as their happy who cares what the family says, at least they can still find happiness somewhere in life despite their horrible loses. Good for them
ive heard this story before... people fall in love with brothers and sisters of their husband once the death, because they are the only people they feel that feel the same pain as they do. therefore they go to each other, confide in each other, and feel like they love each other when really they are just both sad and bonding by being good friends
Personally i found that un-right and not-natural to be falling in love with a brother in laws and even after her husband' death. That just me. However, i do agree with true love; if he is really the right one then go for it. Good Luck with whatever choice she and he makes.
no i think she should go for it if she likes him. her husband would be proud that she has moved on and made love again
kinda hard to see a problem with this
I think its probably not a relationship that will work/be healthy for them in the long term. It seems more like they are probably drawn to each other because of their grief/mental issues from losing the family members. And they should probably get a TON of counseling before they are together.


Also- only ONE year after the accident%26gt;? no, like 8 months and they're already together? That is a definite sign this is just cause they're still traumatized from the accident, this is going to end really badly if its a true story.


If I were a family member I would be pissed off at the wife and think the brother needed tons of therapy. Or pissed at both and think both needed therapy. This is a very unhealthy relationship.
My view on this is that their relationship is legitimate, however, i don't think it is prudent that they should get married so soon, they should wait for a reasonable amount of time to go through the grieving process and to let relatives and friends get used to the new arrangements and grow to accept them. I believe that the bible says that there are only 2 reasons when it is authorized by the bible for two people to get remarried; the first reason is if the persons husband or wife has been sexually unfaithfull and the other reason is if the husband or wife has died and it is obvious from what you say that jeff, her husband died in that accident, and since eric is single there is nothing wrong with him getting married. but the opinion and feeling of the relatives and friends is also very important because that can affect the relationship if they get married in a very significant way, I think that if they want to get married they should talk it over in great detail first with all of those relatives and friends so they can get them to change their mind and accept their relationship even if at first they do so reluctantly, but you should let some time pass out of respect for the dead in my opinion. WITH MANY BLESSINGS MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YUOURS INFINITELY AND MAY GOD BLESS THE U.S.A.INFINITELY AND MAY GOD NOT FORGET TO BLESS ME INFINITELY ALSO.
Well, I can tell you this, not sure if it is right or wrong, but this happened on my fathers side of the family and my mothers. When my grandpa (dad's side) was born, his father died the same day. So when my grandpa was born, my great grandpa died. My great grandma remarried her brother-in-law (great grandpa's brother). This was many years ago, like maybe 1905 or 1906. On mom's side, I have an uncle (mom's brother) and when his wife died, he remarried her sister. This was in the 1980's. I guess if it was acceptable then, why not now. Does she believe in her heart that her husband would have been ok with this? If so, she should go for it.
i don't think that is such a great idea. I think they were both so devastated that they lost someone so they leaned on each other for support. Then they had been depending on each other for so long that they thought they loved each other but the truth is they are still in shock. they need to wait a while. Also how disrespectful to Jeff. He was happily married then just a year later his brother and wife are together. She must have not loved him if she has moved on this fast. She loved Jeff so she married him. If the marriage was a happy marriage then she would have not moved on so quickly. She and Eric probably had something going on before the accident. That is really stupid and immature.
She and He both have the Grief over the loss of his brother, and her husband. This bonds them immensly because they both miss him and love him. The deceased Husband would probably look on it honorably and favorably if he knows they really have a chance at love. I think they used to do this in the olden days....and it works out pretty well. So as long as they truly fall in love and get married or something then this could be a great solution and blessing.